I can't describe my pain

Today, while enjoying a fine cuisine at a local fast food chain, I was attacked. No real harm was put on me but I will always be forced to remember. My favorite shirt was ruined in the assault on my form. I was drenched in ketchup in a similar fashion to that of an old lynch mob pouring tar on a black man. The shirt, a long sleeve, silk shirt was destroyed. I planned to wear it on the day I became engaged to my lucky woman, if I ever find her that is..

Anyways, my attacker was a husky man, 'bout 5'4. The idea of him brings that rare smile to my face but the image is corrupt, my shirt is lost.

My life, it seems, is like a poetic tragedy.